Dear cyclists, A challenge…

Dear cyclists,
A challenge for you. 
But first, a confession.
I'm giving up the bike. After two decades of commuting on two wheels, I've determined it's time to exercise my prerogative as an Ontarian.
I'm getting a car.
Now, before you flip me off for changing lanes, hear me out.
For starters, we cyclists have been missing out on the savings afforded to car users in this province. Not only has Premier Ford generously eliminated licence plate renewal fees, he also plans to extend - for a third time - a tax rebate at the pumps.
These reductions, Finance Minister Bethlenfalvy reminds us, are the government's way of "helping to keep costs down for the people of Ontario." 
By 'people,' of course, he doesn't mean you. He means the people with cars. He means the people of Ontario.
Perhaps you're thinking: 'But I save thousands a year by foregoing insurance premiums and parking costs and maintenance fees. And I never buy gas.'
I wouldn't be so smug. You'll soon be made to direct some of those savings toward cost of the much-needed improvements outlined in Bill 212, Reducing Gridlock, Saving You Time Act. This long-overdue bill will earmark even more of your income - to the tune of tens of millions of dollars, by one recent estimate - to delete bikes lanes from GTA streets.
Then there's the six billion dollar price tag for the proposed highway 413. Perhaps you're wondering: Does Ontario need yet another highway? One that will cost over $1,000 per Ontarian? One that will raze ecologically sensitive wetlands in order to save, at best, minutes to the commutes of a minority of Ontarians?
I used to ask those kinds of questions, too. Then I decided to get a car.
See, if you, like me, warmed to the dictum of 'four wheels good, two wheels bad', you might come to appreciate how, though these figures seem exorbitant - an amount of money that could, say, fund a provincial breakfast program for students, or take an ailing healthcare system off life support - there's no price too high when it comes to getting the people of Ontario moving again. 
Perhaps you're wondering: Haven't the experts told us time and again that lane removals and new highways won't solve gridlock? 
Well, the people of Ontario disagree. Rip up the lanes, and urban congestion will at last disappear. Build the highways, and your soul-sucking commute will become a relic. That is a vision that we, the people of Ontario, believe. One which we are prepared to work for and pay for.
Dear cyclists, wouldn't you like to be counted among us, the people of Ontario? By most estimates, there are hundreds of thousands of utilitarian cyclists in the GTA alone. Bill 212 would ensure that there'd be room enough for all of us on our streets and highways.
And so, my challenge: join me. Get a car. Let's all get cars. Thanks to the Premier's vision and fiscal conservative leadership, our roads will once again be free and flowing and yours to discover. 
Ditch the bike and buckle up. It's your prerogative, after all.